So . . . Last Wednesday, I got my G back . . . And, nearly two weeks after my spill on the trails, I can almost breath again without pain . . . and, despite some stress, my speech Saturday night went fine. Things are looking up for P3 . . .
With respect to the speech, I probably put more effort into it than needed, and stressed over it more than I should have. I finished a draft on Wednesday, and then spent a couple of hours over the next few days "massaging" parts of it. I find that certain phrases sometimes sound good in your head, but prove difficult to speak out loud. So, I did some practice runs and changed some wording around here and there. By Friday night, I was fairly comfortable with it. Then, Saturday morning, I questioned the entire tone of the thing. While there were certainly some nice, heart-felt, sentiments involved, the first several minutes were basically a dry, sarcastic, roast, with some subtle homosexual innuendo mixed in. I mean, if you Googled how to give a wedding toast, the outlines you'd find would look nothing like what I had prepared. What's more, I knew that the humor would utterly bomb if not delivered with the correct pacing/timing, which, of course, would require that I not be nervous and rush through it. So, there I was, several hours before the wedding, wondering what the fuck I had been thinking. Ultimately, however, I stuck with it . . . limited myself to two drinks before hand (I figured if I bombed sober, people would just pity me . . . but if I bombed drunk, people would really hate me) . . . and delivered to goods. It was actually a bit . . . like, almost . . . sort of . . . nearly . . . fun . . . I was, however, glad to put it behind me.
Now, I'm trying to get refocused in the office. I've been unmotivated lately. I've been a bit slow. And, for whatever reason, I find it difficult to focus when I'm not slammed. I need looming deadlines. I prefer to be under a mountain of work, even forced to spend weekends in the office. When I'm not, I just procrastinate. It's a shitty feeling to be driving home after 11 hours in the office and to not have accomplished much . . . feeling like a fraud. I need to turn my shit around. Stat.
So, in this vein, I cancelled my trip to Vegas that had been scheduled for this weekend. I just don't want to miss work Friday. You know, guys like me and TBC are all about the grind . . . Instead, I'm planning on spending Saturday/Sunday in Baltimore catching the O's / Royals series, enjoying the nice weather and an adult beverage or ten. I may even stop by Maryland Live! Saturday morning on the drive up to grind some sweet, sweet "devils game" . . . In the meantime, P3 has gotsta get his lawyering on . . .